The end of August is here which means the start of a new school year. Normally, I get pretty excited for the school year to begin, but to be honest, the approach of this school year has been a struggle. Summer has just been too short!!! I don't know why, but summer went by way too fast this year. Maybe it's because it rained for almost the whole month of June so it seemed to get off to a late start. Maybe it's because we'll have a full week and a half of school before Labor Day this year. Maybe it's because I've always worked in the summer, but I got to spend this summer staying at home with Collin. After all, time off always seems to go by faster than time spent working. To make it all even better, Collin has been sick for the first few days that he had to be in the nursery. So, whatever the reason, when people ask me if I'm ready to start the school year, the answer is a big fat NO.
I have a lot of reasons for not being ready. The biggest is that I don't want to be away from my sweet baby for that much time. I've also really started to enjoy staying home and having the time to be more organized at home. I've enjoyed being able to go to lunch with friends or going to hang out at Colleen's for the day. I've enjoyed being able to be involved with Matt's business and having him come home for lunch sometimes or meeting him for lunch on the job. I've enjoyed sleeping in a little and not wearing skirts and hose every day. This funk I've been in is not typical for me. I am usually a pretty upbeat person who looks at the glass half-full, and I've been frustrated with myself for getting so down about the whole thing.
As I was feeling increasingly despondent about the school year, I was reminded of Phil. 4:11, "For I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content", and this has been the verse that I keep coming back to. It's such an encouragement to me to read that Paul, whose circumstances were far worse than what I complain about, could be content. I am also so encouraged whenever I read the word learned there. Even to an amazing man of God like Paul, being content was something of a process. Contentment isn't something that just comes naturally to "good" Christians. Being a Christian does not instantly guarantee us a life full of warm fuzzy feelings even if we are "doing all the right things". Being content is not something that I can learn or work at all by myself. I can't just "look at all the people that are worse off" or "focus on happy things" to be truly content. My contentment that I'm learning to have comes from changing my focus to God - getting to know Him better and resting in the knowledge that it's part of His plan to have me right where I am. I don't know what His plan is for me for this year, but it's His perfect plan so it has to be good. With that knowledge, I can, like Paul, learn to be content in whatever state I am.
As my attitude has changed, I've been able to see some really positive thngs about this school year and I thought I'd list some of those here since I started out listing a bunch of negative things.
1. I had the summer off! I got so stuck on not wanting to go back to school, that I forgot that most of the world has to work twelve months a year instead of nine.
2. I have a job! When I was grumbling during Sunday School this week about having to go back on Monday, a lady in the class who has been out of work for sometime changed my perspective by pointing out, "At least you have a job to go to. So many people are out of a job that you need to count your blessings every day that you wake up with a job to go to that day." Point taken.
3. Collin is at the school with me and I get to go see him during the day! Lots of people have to leave their kids in the early morning hours and don't pick them up again until six or later at night. I leave Collin at 8, pick him up at 3:45, and get to see him a couple of times in between.
4. Collin is in good hands during the day! Collin is watched in the nursery at our church by a fabulous Christian lady who I know and trust and who loves Collin almost as much as she loves her own kids.
5. I get to go to a job I love! I love getting to stretch my brain with word problems and Calculus, and I love the interaction I have with my students.
This list could go on and on, but I've already shown my babblative nature and dragged this entry on pretty long so I'll leave it at that.
School starts on Thursday! If you think about it, please pray for our school year.
LIVE. LAUGH. LOVE. That's how we roll.
Tuesday, August 25
Wednesday, July 29
Salute to stay-at-home moms
I stole this from a friend's facebook because it made me laugh. I'm sure I know some other people who will enjoy it as well.
If you can't read it because of the size, I put the full text here also:
TELL ME ABOUT IT ®
By Carolyn HaxWednesday, May 23, 2007; Page C10
Carolyn:
Best friend has child. Her: exhausted, busy, no time for self, no time for me, etc. Me (no kids): Wow. Sorry. What'd you do today? Her: Park, play group . . .
Carolyn:
Best friend has child. Her: exhausted, busy, no time for self, no time for me, etc.
Me (no kids): Wow. Sorry. What'd you do today?
Her: Park, play group . . .
Okay. I've done Internet searches, I've talked to parents. I don't get it. What do stay-at-home moms do all day? Please no lists of library, grocery store, dry cleaners . . . I do all those things, too, and I don't do them EVERY DAY. I guess what I'm asking is: What is a typical day and why don't moms have time for a call or e-mail? I work and am away from home nine hours a day (plus a few late work events) and I manage to get it all done. I'm feeling like the kid is an excuse to relax and enjoy -- not a bad thing at all -- but if so, why won't my friend tell me the truth? Is this a peeing contest ("My life is so much harder than yours")? What's the deal? I've got friends with and without kids and all us child-free folks get the same story and have the same questions.
Tacoma, Wash.
Relax and enjoy. You're funny.
Or you're lying about having friends with kids.
Or you're taking them at their word that they actually have kids, because you haven't personally been in the same room with them.
Internet searches?
I keep wavering between giving you a straight answer and giving my forehead some keyboard. To claim you want to understand, while in the same breath implying that the only logical conclusions are that your mom-friends are either lying or competing with you, is disingenuous indeed.
So, since it's validation you seem to want, the real answer is what you get. In list form. When you have young kids, your typical day is: constant attention, from getting them out of bed, fed, clean, dressed; to keeping them out of harm's way; to answering their coos, cries, questions; to having two arms and carrying one kid, one set of car keys, and supplies for even the quickest trips, including the latest-to-be-declared-essential piece of molded plastic gear; to keeping them from unshelving books at the library; to enforcing rest times; to staying one step ahead of them lest they get too hungry, tired or bored, any one of which produces the kind of checkout-line screaming that gets the checkout line shaking its head.
It's needing 45 minutes to do what takes others 15.
It's constant vigilance, constant touch, constant use of your voice, constant relegation of your needs to the second tier.
It's constant scrutiny and second-guessing from family and friends, well-meaning and otherwise. It's resisting constant temptation to seek short-term relief at everyone's long-term expense.
It's doing all this while concurrently teaching virtually everything -- language, manners, safety, resourcefulness, discipline, curiosity, creativity. Empathy. Everything.
It's also a choice, yes. And a joy. But if you spent all day, every day, with this brand of joy, and then, when you got your first 10 minutes to yourself, wanted to be alone with your thoughts instead of calling a good friend, a good friend wouldn't judge you, complain about you to mutual friends, or marvel how much more productively she uses her time. Either make a sincere effort to understand or keep your snit to yourself.
So this is why somedays I feel like I worked all day and got nothing done?
Oh and lest anybody think to themselves (or dare say out loud), "You say you're so busy, but obviously you have time to sit down and mess around on the internet and blog and stuff", I'm feeding the baby while I blog about this. Have a great day! :-)
P.S. I feel like I can't get anything done sometimes and so far I only have one. I know many other incredible ladies who do seem to manage to get everything done and they have more than one (some of them MUCH more than one).
If you can't read it because of the size, I put the full text here also:TELL ME ABOUT IT ®
By Carolyn HaxWednesday, May 23, 2007; Page C10
Carolyn:
Best friend has child. Her: exhausted, busy, no time for self, no time for me, etc. Me (no kids): Wow. Sorry. What'd you do today? Her: Park, play group . . .
Carolyn:
Best friend has child. Her: exhausted, busy, no time for self, no time for me, etc.
Me (no kids): Wow. Sorry. What'd you do today?
Her: Park, play group . . .
Okay. I've done Internet searches, I've talked to parents. I don't get it. What do stay-at-home moms do all day? Please no lists of library, grocery store, dry cleaners . . . I do all those things, too, and I don't do them EVERY DAY. I guess what I'm asking is: What is a typical day and why don't moms have time for a call or e-mail? I work and am away from home nine hours a day (plus a few late work events) and I manage to get it all done. I'm feeling like the kid is an excuse to relax and enjoy -- not a bad thing at all -- but if so, why won't my friend tell me the truth? Is this a peeing contest ("My life is so much harder than yours")? What's the deal? I've got friends with and without kids and all us child-free folks get the same story and have the same questions.
Tacoma, Wash.
Relax and enjoy. You're funny.
Or you're lying about having friends with kids.
Or you're taking them at their word that they actually have kids, because you haven't personally been in the same room with them.
Internet searches?
I keep wavering between giving you a straight answer and giving my forehead some keyboard. To claim you want to understand, while in the same breath implying that the only logical conclusions are that your mom-friends are either lying or competing with you, is disingenuous indeed.
So, since it's validation you seem to want, the real answer is what you get. In list form. When you have young kids, your typical day is: constant attention, from getting them out of bed, fed, clean, dressed; to keeping them out of harm's way; to answering their coos, cries, questions; to having two arms and carrying one kid, one set of car keys, and supplies for even the quickest trips, including the latest-to-be-declared-essential piece of molded plastic gear; to keeping them from unshelving books at the library; to enforcing rest times; to staying one step ahead of them lest they get too hungry, tired or bored, any one of which produces the kind of checkout-line screaming that gets the checkout line shaking its head.
It's needing 45 minutes to do what takes others 15.
It's constant vigilance, constant touch, constant use of your voice, constant relegation of your needs to the second tier.
It's constant scrutiny and second-guessing from family and friends, well-meaning and otherwise. It's resisting constant temptation to seek short-term relief at everyone's long-term expense.
It's doing all this while concurrently teaching virtually everything -- language, manners, safety, resourcefulness, discipline, curiosity, creativity. Empathy. Everything.
It's also a choice, yes. And a joy. But if you spent all day, every day, with this brand of joy, and then, when you got your first 10 minutes to yourself, wanted to be alone with your thoughts instead of calling a good friend, a good friend wouldn't judge you, complain about you to mutual friends, or marvel how much more productively she uses her time. Either make a sincere effort to understand or keep your snit to yourself.
So this is why somedays I feel like I worked all day and got nothing done?
Oh and lest anybody think to themselves (or dare say out loud), "You say you're so busy, but obviously you have time to sit down and mess around on the internet and blog and stuff", I'm feeding the baby while I blog about this. Have a great day! :-)
P.S. I feel like I can't get anything done sometimes and so far I only have one. I know many other incredible ladies who do seem to manage to get everything done and they have more than one (some of them MUCH more than one).
Tuesday, July 7
The Neighborhood Handyman
Once again, I find myself thinking about blogging regularly, but my mind does not stay on one pursuit for very long (Matt says that if I had gone to public school they would have decided that I was ADD and put me on Ritalin.) so I may post this one entry and then forget about it for several months again, but it's possible that this time I could just stick with it. Seventeenth times a charm, right?
Today is Matt's last day at Handyman Matters. For several months now, he has only worked at Handyman Matters a couple of days a week because they just have not had enough work for him. The other days he has been doing side jobs and working on building a business of his own that would keep him busy full-time. In the past month, his side jobs have really picked up and Handyman Matters jobs have really slowed down, and it became clear to us that now was the time to take that big, scary (but exciting) leap of faith into being totally self-employed. We are so excited about the new business. Matt is officially The Neighborhood Handyman. For the summer, I am working in "the office" (a.k.a the corner of our living room) as the phone answerer, job scheduler, paperwork doer, etc. Our hope is that eventually the business will be thriving enough that I will be able to work from home year round as the office worker, but that's a little ways down the road. For now we are simply praying that the jobs keep coming in. Please keep us in your prayers as we work to get the business off the ground. Also, if you need any work done around your house call (or email) The Neighborhood Handyman. He really is amazing and can do pretty much anything. :-) Below is a copy of his ad that appeared this month in the local Home Improvement Guide.
Have a great day!
Tuesday, February 24
Funny because it's true
This article about 7 lies we believe about facebook is so true about a lot of people (myself included). It made me laugh so I thought I'd pass it along.
Facebook Made Me Do It
Seven lies we tell ourselves about social networking.
Everybody loves to complain about Facebook. But I've been wading through all the nonstop commentary over the last few weeks and I've made a startling discovery. Everybody also lies about why they use Facebook. After exhaustive research, here are the Seven Lies You Tell Yourself About Facebook.
1. I Only Friend People I Really Know: Stop pretending you have standards; you will friend anyone. You would accept Bernie Madoff if he asked. You want your friend count to be sky-high. That's why I accept all sorts of people I haven't seen in 20 years and couldn't pick out of a line-up. I refuse to have one less friend than my arch nemesis from college. I will not tolerate a lower count than my annoying colleague who sucks her teeth in meetings whenever I say anything. Admit it, you're no better than I am—how many of your "friends" would you invite to your house?
2. Facebook Made Me Do It: Facebook didn't make you tell all 1,384 of your friends that you once had chlamydia. Facebook didn't hold your hand onto the mouse and force you to type: "Josh is in favor of slapping geese and women," as one of your "25 random things" and it certainly didn't waterboard you into asking everyone what their slave name is. Psychiatrists call this "externalizing blame." It's a way to lay-off shame and self-loathing onto somebody (or something) else so you can feel better about yourself. I once wrote, "Raina is feeling like the cat's meow," and hated Facebook for days because of it. I know now that it was nobody else's fault but my own.
3. Wall-to-Wall Flirting Isn't Cheating: Just because it's called "social networking" with "friends" doesn't make hard-core online flirting OK. Do not try and tell me that you were surprised when your boyfriend left you after he read your pornographic wall-to-wall with his cousin. Also: stop sending your assistant cute virtual gifts. Virtual gifting counts. In fact, it's probably not appropriate for you to be "friending" her or the cute summer intern in the first place. Same thing goes for wall-to-wall stalking the love of your 7th grade life. Online harassment is just as bad as the bricks and mortar kind.
4. I Use Facebook to Keep in Touch With People: No, the truth is you're nosy. Admit it. You scour the profiles of other people for the same reason I do. You want to know their business. Facebook isn't addictive—your desire to know what other people are up to is addictive. The over-sharing thrills you. I know I'm hooked. Don't you hunt through your friends' walls looking for any scrap of information that will produce that warm tingly schadenfreude feeling?
Facebook is our own personal reality show and our friends are the stars. What else besides "American Idol" or "Project Runway" allows you to be so judgmental while wearing pajamas? If people stopped revealing ridiculous stuff about themselves in their status updates, "Rock of Love" would be your "guilty pleasure" instead. You know you're dying to discover your college roommate lives in a trailer in his mom's backyard. I literally cried from joy when I saw that an ex-boyfriend was sporting a comb-over.
5. I'm Soooo Over Facebook: Come on. You love Facebook for exactly the reasons you pretend to hate it ... it's the Big Thing. And we're not falling for that ironic distancing pose you've been adopting lately. We know you spend hours looking for former girlfriends or that guy who you loved from freshman psych but didn't have the courage to talk to. I tried to act all Margaret Meadish when I first joined Facebook ("It's a classic example of mass hysteria inspired by our collective need to be famous. Blah, blah, blah.") But everybody knew I wasn't on there doing social anthropology. I was on there because I wanted to snicker at that girl I went to elementary school with who reports every single one of the eight pomegranate martinis she drinks every night.
6. And I am Soooo Not Competitive: We don't just want more friends than everybody else; we also want the highest score in Word Twist and the most virtual Easter Eggs. I recently spent nearly 24 hours playing Scramble on Facebook until I had a higher score than my friend Dough Dough. Why? Because I knew Facebook would send him a note that said; "Raina has beaten your personal high score on Scramble." When he commented on his complete and total defeat, I just said; "I didn't know Facebook would tell you that. OMG! LOL!" We love Facebook because it allows you to gloat to your heart's content and hide that self-satisfied smirk on your face behind the wall of the Internet. By the way, if you have a Scramble score higher than 147, don't even think about friending me.
7. Facebook is My Friend: No, it's a business (albeit one that has yet to make money). Everyone knows casinos hide the exits and pump oxygen into the air to keep you gambling and get all your money. Facebook is doing the same thing but with avatars and Food Flings. They want to trap you behind their dotcom walls so they can attract advertisers. Think about it. If Facebook really loved you, they wouldn't run those "5 Friends HATE you!" banners on the top of Scramble. And have you ever had a friend try to take ownership of all the posts and baby pictures you sent them for who knows what reason? Nor has a "friend" ever taunted me with ads that implied Obama owed me $12,000 in personal-stimulus money.
© 2009
#s 1, 4, and 6 really apply to me (particularly number 4). Not that it's going to make me stop using facebook, but interesting nonetheless......
Facebook Made Me Do It
Seven lies we tell ourselves about social networking.
Everybody loves to complain about Facebook. But I've been wading through all the nonstop commentary over the last few weeks and I've made a startling discovery. Everybody also lies about why they use Facebook. After exhaustive research, here are the Seven Lies You Tell Yourself About Facebook.
1. I Only Friend People I Really Know: Stop pretending you have standards; you will friend anyone. You would accept Bernie Madoff if he asked. You want your friend count to be sky-high. That's why I accept all sorts of people I haven't seen in 20 years and couldn't pick out of a line-up. I refuse to have one less friend than my arch nemesis from college. I will not tolerate a lower count than my annoying colleague who sucks her teeth in meetings whenever I say anything. Admit it, you're no better than I am—how many of your "friends" would you invite to your house?
2. Facebook Made Me Do It: Facebook didn't make you tell all 1,384 of your friends that you once had chlamydia. Facebook didn't hold your hand onto the mouse and force you to type: "Josh is in favor of slapping geese and women," as one of your "25 random things" and it certainly didn't waterboard you into asking everyone what their slave name is. Psychiatrists call this "externalizing blame." It's a way to lay-off shame and self-loathing onto somebody (or something) else so you can feel better about yourself. I once wrote, "Raina is feeling like the cat's meow," and hated Facebook for days because of it. I know now that it was nobody else's fault but my own.
3. Wall-to-Wall Flirting Isn't Cheating: Just because it's called "social networking" with "friends" doesn't make hard-core online flirting OK. Do not try and tell me that you were surprised when your boyfriend left you after he read your pornographic wall-to-wall with his cousin. Also: stop sending your assistant cute virtual gifts. Virtual gifting counts. In fact, it's probably not appropriate for you to be "friending" her or the cute summer intern in the first place. Same thing goes for wall-to-wall stalking the love of your 7th grade life. Online harassment is just as bad as the bricks and mortar kind.
4. I Use Facebook to Keep in Touch With People: No, the truth is you're nosy. Admit it. You scour the profiles of other people for the same reason I do. You want to know their business. Facebook isn't addictive—your desire to know what other people are up to is addictive. The over-sharing thrills you. I know I'm hooked. Don't you hunt through your friends' walls looking for any scrap of information that will produce that warm tingly schadenfreude feeling?
Facebook is our own personal reality show and our friends are the stars. What else besides "American Idol" or "Project Runway" allows you to be so judgmental while wearing pajamas? If people stopped revealing ridiculous stuff about themselves in their status updates, "Rock of Love" would be your "guilty pleasure" instead. You know you're dying to discover your college roommate lives in a trailer in his mom's backyard. I literally cried from joy when I saw that an ex-boyfriend was sporting a comb-over.
5. I'm Soooo Over Facebook: Come on. You love Facebook for exactly the reasons you pretend to hate it ... it's the Big Thing. And we're not falling for that ironic distancing pose you've been adopting lately. We know you spend hours looking for former girlfriends or that guy who you loved from freshman psych but didn't have the courage to talk to. I tried to act all Margaret Meadish when I first joined Facebook ("It's a classic example of mass hysteria inspired by our collective need to be famous. Blah, blah, blah.") But everybody knew I wasn't on there doing social anthropology. I was on there because I wanted to snicker at that girl I went to elementary school with who reports every single one of the eight pomegranate martinis she drinks every night.
6. And I am Soooo Not Competitive: We don't just want more friends than everybody else; we also want the highest score in Word Twist and the most virtual Easter Eggs. I recently spent nearly 24 hours playing Scramble on Facebook until I had a higher score than my friend Dough Dough. Why? Because I knew Facebook would send him a note that said; "Raina has beaten your personal high score on Scramble." When he commented on his complete and total defeat, I just said; "I didn't know Facebook would tell you that. OMG! LOL!" We love Facebook because it allows you to gloat to your heart's content and hide that self-satisfied smirk on your face behind the wall of the Internet. By the way, if you have a Scramble score higher than 147, don't even think about friending me.
7. Facebook is My Friend: No, it's a business (albeit one that has yet to make money). Everyone knows casinos hide the exits and pump oxygen into the air to keep you gambling and get all your money. Facebook is doing the same thing but with avatars and Food Flings. They want to trap you behind their dotcom walls so they can attract advertisers. Think about it. If Facebook really loved you, they wouldn't run those "5 Friends HATE you!" banners on the top of Scramble. And have you ever had a friend try to take ownership of all the posts and baby pictures you sent them for who knows what reason? Nor has a "friend" ever taunted me with ads that implied Obama owed me $12,000 in personal-stimulus money.
© 2009
#s 1, 4, and 6 really apply to me (particularly number 4). Not that it's going to make me stop using facebook, but interesting nonetheless......
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